i am more convinced every day that real progress is always fundamentally based on mutation; on random events in the environment. that to be truly at peace with the progress made, we must come to terms with the fact that much of the process is out of our hands – we can simply observe changes in the environment, and if we are open to them, we can leverage them.
today i set my interval timer to click once every 30 seconds in order to pace my breathing properly. i have noticed previously that when doing this, i am kept much better on track; at least my breathing is totally slow and regular which seems beneficial to my ability to keep clear during the time. today, about 1o minutes into the meditation, the battery on the camera died, and the clicking stopped; however, it had gone long enough to set my patterns up for the rest of the meditation – not perfectly, but my breathing was generally more regular, and i was no longer attached specifically to hearing a click; it was almost as if a metronome had been started to give me the beat, long enough to internalize it, and then faded away to allow a rubato to come back into play. once again, this was a complete environmental mutation that was leveraged, and may in fact provide a useful general constraint. in fact, my time lapse controller can set a total number of photos – meaning, i can have it automatically turn off halfway through the session.
There is a quote from Shakespeare that has hit me during my meditation this morning:
The poet's eye, in fine frenzy rolling, Doth glance from heaven to earth, from earth to heaven; And as imagination bodies forth The forms of things unknown, the poet's pen Turns them to shapes and gives to airy nothing A local habitation and a name.
Man takes elements in our world that are beyond any classification, and uses language to bind them to specifics. ‘The forms of things unknown’ are given a name; the left brain is allowed to compartmentalize them and thus to refer to them as concepts and ideas; but the things themselves have no nature as simple as we allude; they are simply ‘airy nothing’ – specificity seems an illusion we use for the sake of efficiency.